MICROBUDGET MASSACRE!
A Look at new Indie Horror...

For an SOV amateur movie, HOUSE OF CARNAGE is not bad. Not that good or compelling, mind you, but not terrible, either. In news clips we’re told of a cannibal family, who we learn later kidnap women to become baby makers, women bred to have demon babies who roam the nearby woods .I could have used a little more set-up on the victims, and maybe something else, I don’t know what. An extra feature reveals that they shot with just an outline, and it shows. It needs focus that a script would provide. Music (by Tony Diana) is pretty good, it’s seriously creepy and effective and certainly adds a lot to the film, perhaps more than it merits. But moonlighting strippers as victims do show their boobies! Shot on DV, with fake film wear lines, especially in the “archive” footage. Scratched leader footage is inserted periodically for state of mind, and to imply tension, I suppose. Lots of bloody T-shirts, but not as much gore as you might think, mostly cutaways and reactions shots, not full-on gore. Best actress is Danielle Donahue, who escapes to tell her story in flashbacks to a psychiatrist who appears to be reading his lines. Some shots suffer from one-camera blahs, and the direction is somewhat static. The constant creepy music and use of inserts soon becomes overdone, the director needs to pace and space that stuff a little better. Pet peeve: a girl hardly screams when she gets her fingers cut off. Foot cut off (off screen) in a scene reminiscent of 2000 Maniacs. Lots of time spent in the ancient creepy farmhouse with the cannibal clan terrorizing the broads, with Peter Blessel doing a great Chop-Top impression, even saying, “Dog will hunt” at one part. Low-budget filmmaker Phil Herman is amusing as the T.V. doctor who hardly ever looks at the camera. The girl turns the tables on killers, and there’s a funny ending when the family attacks the live news crew. HOUSE OF CARNAGE is available in late September 2006 from www.b-movie.com.
Harder to enjoy is the short GRAVE MATTER from jolly olde England. The UK’s Trickshot Productions sent us this 30-minute short. Sorry, blokes, but there’s just not much to review here, half the film is so dark as to be unwatchable. The filmmakers put a disclaimer saying they shot night for night, and to adjust the brightness on your set. After an underlit indoor scene of “comic” drunken speed chess, two young schmucks find a book of evil spells in the garage and summon up some dead back to life. They go out to a graveyard, only to run away when they all of a sudden realize they have to kill ‘em with a chainsaw (then why’d they go there in the first place?). Unfortunately, most of the payoff scenes are at night, and thus so dark that I really can’t tell if the special effects are any good or not. Painfully bad white-boy rap is included, with a way too long music video type segment. Even the 15-minute version of this film, included on the DVD, seems padded. Too-loud monster sounds and near-total darkness are covering lots of gore---at least I think so. Unwise “Brain Dead” quote at the end gives away their influences and invites comparison with a superior film. At least they’ve got a sense of humor about it. DVD padded out with poster gallery, behind the scenes stuff, and footage from a film festival appearance. GRAVE MATTER is available from www.trickshot-films.co.uk.
PROJECT: VALKYRIE is a 2002 movie from Jeff Waltrowksi, who also has a small part in this stinker. In a decent premise wasted, a guy who inherited a robot from his grandfather intended to fight Nazis reassembles it 60 years later, but also brings back some virus which makes the local skinheads turn into hideous powerful mutants. The makeup effects on the neonazis are about the only thing worthwhile in the film. The acting is poor, the music is inappropriate, and the pacing drags terribly with extraneous bits of unfunny comedy. It also seems to not be sure what type of film it is, a nostalgic comic book farce or horror film, and turns out to be neither. The robot is soooooo just a guy in a suit, and the leading man’s attempts to be earthy and likeable made him highly annoying. Available through Tempe Entertainment www.tempevideo.com.
EDDIE PRESLEY is an odd 1992 character study of a down and out Elvis impersonator, played by Duane Whitaker (the pawnshop owner from Pulp Fiction). He’s a security guard who lives in his van and waits for the day he can return to his Elvis act. It’s just on the verge of being really interesting most of the time. Not as quirky or profound as it wants to be, it’s still features some decent acting, and if it seems to go nowhere, you can try to spot roles from the filmmakers’ talented friends like Ted Raimi, Lawrence Tierney, and Clu Gulager (who has funniest lines) as a sleazy agent. Don’t blink or you’ll miss the cameos by Bruce Campbell and Quentin Tarantino. Whitaker’s definitely got acting chops, but his impossibly long flop in the final act is not quite manic or final enough to warrant an hour of build-up. The needed payoff scene didn’t pull everything together, and that’s a shame, cause it’s still watchable even if it did go on way too long. Looks to be shot on film. No boobs or violence, like the other films on our list, maybe because it’s from Whitaker’s play. Also distributed from Tempe.

-Eric Bradner